Last updated on 01/26/2016
After a long fight with the usual backward-thinking Johnson Hall admins, Prof. Emmett Brown (Physics) and the UO Senate’s Radiation and Skateboard Safety Committee have succeeded in exempting cold-fusion powered hoverboards from the new Emergency Electronic Skateboard Ban Policy:
In related news, the UOPD is confiscating the spontaneously combustible electronic skateboards from students and shipping them to a US government facility at Malheur Lake, for appropriate disposal.
This is really a preemptive effort of the campus cops to keep their cars and kill my one suggestion that cops ride hoverboards in the academic senate.
I think it might be related to the university’s efforts to keep total energy use flat despite growth in campus population and square footage. I mean, think of all those jigawatts!
Forget cold fusion, I think it’s time UO started harvesting zero point!