8/9/2013: U of Nike T-shirts now available! Click here to order from CafePress. $4 from each shirt goes to help UO Matters pay UO’s exorbitant public records fees, and maybe buy me a wee dram or two. Now also in Kelly green, by popular demand. Order one of each before Nike’s lawyers shut this down.
8/8/2013 Sweat Shop update: Some commenter – obviously not an economist – suggests I get the University of Nike t-shirts made in China. This is probably a reference to the 2000 Worker’s Rights Consortium fiasco, where UO President Dave Frohnmayer signed UO up with the WRC, which was fighting what they claimed was Nike’s use of “sweat shop labor” in countries like China. Phil Knight famously said Frohnmayer had “shredded the bonds of trust” with him, and he hasn’t given a dime to UO’s academic side since.
Well, the sad truth is that I can’t afford to get these U of Nike shirts made in China. Their economy has been booming ever since they started inviting foreign investments from “sweat shop” companies like Nike. Chinese wages are now so high that I’d have no profits left over to pay President Gottfredson for public records! Here’s some recent data:
The comparator is India, which until recently pursued an idiotic Ghandian policy of economic self reliance. Their people paid the price: still making t-shirts for $1500 a year, while plenty of Chinese are now rich enough to send their kids to the University of Nike for an education. Often in economics.
Hmm, maybe Uncle Phil is smarter, and not quite as evil, as some people think?
8/8/2013 updates: Ian Campbell of the Oregon Daily Emerald has a great piece on the true cost to UO students of the University of Nike’s boring blow-out wins:
The average college student only gets a total of 132 days — Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays — per year to party, which means wasting some of that time watching the Ducks beat Arizona by 49 doesn’t become a high priority after the third quarter ….
This may explain Oregon’s disappointing #20 finish in the prestigious Princeton Review rankings. Although for a more serious take on the connection between big-time college football wins and college grades, read this article by some U of Nike economists.
8/7/2013 update: CSN is now reporting the Sweat Shop cost $138M. UO’s Risk Management Office probably has an exact number, since it must be on our insurance policy by now. Say, I wonder if VPFA Jamie Moffitt is going to make Rob Mullens pay any of the premiums for it? And spokesjock Craig Pintens is not backing off the “We are the U of Nike” statement.
8/6/2013 update: The University of Nike needs a motto for the t-shirts and coffee cups. In Latin, of course. Any suggestions? If you need inspiration, watch the Register Guard’s video below. Thanks to an anon commenter for the link, and to football coach Matt Helfrich for this quote:
“Incredible function the other night, there were about 20 boosters, myself included, crying over the personal nature of, whatever it was”.
Smells like #2 from here, Coach:
8/6/2013 update: UO finally lets local reporters see inside the new football Sweat Shop. Diane Dietz of the RG takes it as an opportunity to write about UO’s decrepit classrooms, and RG Columnist Bob Welch says:
“And if this is also about coddling athletes — and let’s be honest, it is — then what happens when these young men head out into a world that’s real, not fantasy?
Besides concussion induced brain damage and the chance to try and sue the NCAA to get the rights to their name back, you mean? No wonder Mullens gave SI a week’s lead for their fluff. The letters to the editors attacking this waste of tax-deductible money are also good.
 |
 |
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U of Nike’s Jeff Hawkins:
“… we’re all in this together.”
Except for the money of course,
that’s just for the AD and the coaches.
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Typical UO classroom in PLC, no AC.
Formica table, to remind students to study hard so they don’t end up living in a trailer while they repay their loans. Chairs were carefully selected to show off the last 120 years of seating technology. Floor is of vintage linoleum, with tastefully exposed rough asbestos edges, and a few missing pieces to represent the required courses that UO doesn’t have room to teach this quarter. |
Meanwhile, Gottfredson still hasn’t appointed a committee to implement the May Senate resolution for ending athletic subsidies and getting the jocks to contribute to the academic side. How about taxing these excessive donations to the jocks, and using the money for UO’s academic mission? Unlikely, Kitzhaber is still trying to figure out just how many jock-sniffers to appoint to the UO Board.
8/5/2013: Professor Hawkins wasn’t kidding. Type “UniversityofNike.com” into your browser and see where it takes you. That .com really hurts. Couldn’t we have at least kept the .edu extension? Still no retraction from Hawkins and Mullens, and no comment at all from President Gottfredson.
8/2/2013: Rob Mullens in the NY Times, on the new UO football “Sweat Shop”, as it’s being called around campus:
“People will complain, but this is not excessive,” said Rob Mullens, the university’s athletic director.
Of course it’s not excessive, you deserve it all Rob. We just want you to stop spending tuition money on jock stuff. But our efforts to name this building have come to naught. Instead, the athletic department has decided to rename the entire university:
“We are the University of Nike,” said Jeff Hawkins, the senior associate athletic director of football administration and operations. “We embrace it. We tell that to our recruits.”
Just the sort of publicity that will encourage parents to entrust their kids, and $45K a year, to UO. And it turns out Mr. Hawkins is on the payroll for a $29,500 performance bonus, as faculty. Hmm:
I’m guessing Professor Hawkins will soon issue a heartfelt apology regretting how his remarks were misinterpreted, along the lines of the one UO spokesperson Dave Williford had to make regarding his comments to the NYT back in December 2011. To be followed by another bonus from Dean Rob Mullens.
7/31/2013: Back in 2010 the NY Times reported that the UO students were calling the Jaqua athlete-only tutoring center the “Jock Box”.
OK, maybe that was because I made up the name and then told the reporter that’s what everyone on campus was calling it. The point is that it stuck, and you can see Mullens and the JH admins wince every time they hear it. So, anyone got a good sobriquet for Knight’s latest gift?
There’s the coach’s sous-chef: UO job posting at http://jobs.uoregon.edu/unclassified.php?id=4301
And some more background on this lovely gift, from 11/22/2010:
Oregonian headline: “State board approves Phil Knight-University of Oregon request after Richard Lariviere warns of ‘profound’ consequences”
8/3/2013: I’ve got to start the voting for top 5 names soon to get this on the Senate agenda for the next meeting, so comments close Monday. And we could use ideas for the youtube video. Our casting director is searching for the “Go Ducks Nutsack Man”, since he’s already got the sweaty jock-strap. Any recent sightings?
I already saw this somewhere else so can’t take credit nor give credit because I forgot where I saw it. It’s probably even too obvious but also perfect:
Ozymandias
I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desart. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed:
And on the pedestal these words appear:
“My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!”
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.[1]
Are you embarrassed to have gleaned this from a TV promo for the final season of “Breaking Bad”? It’s okay. We’ll only judge you a little bit.
Not one bit embarrassed.
When’s the season start? Great show.
Hmm … Castel de-Lusion?
dog
Shelley
personally I like this one instead (not Shelley)
We are the fools of time and terror. Days
Steal on us and steal from us; yet we live
Loathing our life, and dreading still to die.
In all the days of this detested yoke —
This heaving burthen, this accursed breath —
This vital weight upon the struggling heart,
Which sinks with sorrow, or beats quick with pain 170
Or joy that ends in agony or faintness —
In all the days of past and future, for
In life there is no present, we can number
How few — how less than few — wherein the soul
Forbears to pant for death, and yet draws back
As from a stream in winter, though the chill
Be but a moment’s. I have one resource
Still in my science — I can call the dead
And ask them what it is we dread to be.
Dog back on topic
oh yeah, what to call it
Club Duck
Gift my ass. His gifts suck.
Philifice
The philacid philifice?
pat killed kenney block.
It’s such a horror. “Club duck” isn’t ugly enough.
Be gracious and say thank you.
hahaha!
For turning UO into a sports blog joke?
On net, he leaves behind implicit taxes on the academic side. Thank you?
Temple of Doom
The Jock Scratch.
The Winged Mausoleum
The House that Willie Built
Diva International
REMINDER:
Law School
Library
Knight Fellowships
Knight Scholarships
(Also–Stanford GSB/OHSU)
Yes, this building is obscene, but stop being such haters. Knight *is* a generous person.
Phil hasn’t given us anything but Jock Itch lately.
And the creeps. That winged black sun logo is increasingly being used in place of the O.
Isn’t that the ***hole of a duck flying away?
Uhh … I’m not qualified to answer that question.
Ask UOM. He’s in the know about almost everything!
Ooh, I like that one for a name…
The Jock Itch!
BTW: If someone has a picture of the Jock Box from the Inside looking out a caption could be:
Preparing UO athletes for their future,
behind bars.
you will get it when you see it
I call it stunning and beautiful.
He hasn’t given anything that doesn’t promote his name and/or business while costing the recipient big dollars. I’d like to see him give to the academic side…buildings of classrooms, classy offices for academic, teaching technology, anything to show a balance between real education and sports promotion. But then promoting real education would not bring him the self promotion he so craves and demands for his “gifts”.
Angry Old Lady, you don’t know anything about Phil Knight. I’d also like to see a major gift to the academic side (and I think one is coming), but the notion that he “craves” “self promotion” is ludicrous.
I just walked around this building and it is absolutely stunning in its design. The fact that this was also designed by a UO alum should be part of the celebration of this gift. And for those carping about the academic side, there has been continual work on renovating our academic buildings (albeit at a slower pace than I would want — please next take down PLC). The thing it clearly points out is that the investment in salaries is not keeping pace — and for that I agree JH is fully responsible and accountable. As for the new center….WOW. If it helps keep the football program at the forefront, brings in dollars that will help pay for the myriad of other sports we have (save acrobatics which is a joke), then I say heartily “Thank you Uncle Phil”.
You’re just feeding the empty notion that the more we spend the more we earn. It’s false. Rather, the more they spend, the more we (the academic side) are forced to spend on athletics, the more they spend, the more we (the academic side) are forced to spend on athletics, the more they spend, the more we (the academic side) are forced to spend on athletics, the more they spend, the more we (the academic side) are forced to spend on athletics…. Get the picture?
It’s sort of sad that the Duck apologists (paid UO PR people?) like anonymous #2 above realize they need to trash the JH central administration in their comments, if they want any credibility with the UO faculty, staff, and administrators that read this blog.
Speaking of diseases, is Kilkenny still getting free UO health insurance?
The Erection
Phil’s Phallus Palace
YES! This one gets my vote.
Thanks UO Matters for once again insulting one of the biggest donors the UO has. You would rather he give nothing than give to sports. And he has given millions to the academic side. Ask the professors who have received a Knight professorship how they feel about his generosity or the faculty and students in the law school….oh, that’s right, you hate lawyers because they make more money than you do. Is thee ANY donation he has made that you appreciate?
You DO have your tiny violin in accompaniment, right?
Dog says
its really most of the commentators that are providing the insults.
I think its a question of balance. My calculation suggests that 90–95% of all
gifts to the UO from Knight have been sports related. If that number were
closer to 70% that would be better. Its mostly the overwhelming amount going
to athletic facilities instead of academic ones that is providing most of the
disgruntlement.
And the strings attached to said “gifts”.
One can sincerely appreciate Knight’s academic gifts while also finding these athletic extravagances appalling. They’re not mutually exclusive thoughts. One presumably gives money to support something one feels is worthwhile, and to build things that leave a positive legacy, not to buy the love of you or me. “Uncle Phil” can give to whatever he wants, and that’s great, whether it’s a pleasure palace for football players, or a giant bonfire of dollar bills burning in front of low-income students to taunt them, or a library, or whatever. And we’re free to describe what we see as the good and bad of these sorts of choices.
Gifts? These aren’t gifts. They are marketing investments that likely have a fantastic ROI given the tax breaks and goodwill that accrue from them.
It’s all about the swoosh.
Yes, I’m sure Phil spends a lot of time on UO Matters and is really upset that a few people on a blog think his football monstrosity is not good for the UO. Take a deep breath. He is worth more than 14 billion dollars and started Nike from the ground up. I think he can deal with a bit of criticism. Also, the building is built. He’s spending his money the way he wants and is influencing the UO in ways that meet his interests, values, and priorities. It’s okay if people differ on what’s best for the UO. For most reasonable people it wouldn’t come as a surprise that faculty would prefer that money donated to the UO be used to improve the primary aims of the institution, mainly learning and scholarship. This of course is what they’ve devoted their lives to. In Phil’s case he has spent his life building a multinational corporation that markets, designs, and manufactures sports equipment. And not surprisingly he’s very invested in improving UO’s athletics.
Phil’s money is one thing. The behavior of our administrators around Phil’s money is another. The conditions they agree to, the explicit and implicit subsidies they permit just to get their grubby hands on his money? That’s seriously appalling.
If fans/supporters realized that they also get taxed with higher ticket prices as a result of all this spending, they’d also questions the expenditure. Oregon clearly cares little about education, but they do care about their ticket prices.
An increasing percentage of “fans/supporters” either didn’t attend UO or didn’t graduate and they don’t care about academics in the least. It might interfere with their drug of choice–winning.
The fact is that Sports Illustrated is doing a story on it. That puts UO on the map just as their winning football team does. As Larriviere once said, “Who cares what the story is about? They are talking about UO on national television.” There is a reason that we are able to attract so many students both in and out of state. Sports actually HELP the University in its efforts to market itself as a great place to be. It is too bad that the academic buildings don’t compare, but they are being slowly improved over time.
Oh please, not this tired, old “sports actually help the university” meme again. Sports Illustrated? Wow. Yawn.
And about ‘who cares what the story is that gets you on the map’? HA! Well, RL learned who cares, and the consequences.
This last comment is delusional and produced by drinking too much PR Koolaid. Where are you getting your information that students choose UO because of sports success? The barber shop, perhaps the one in the new football center? There are so many reasons for college choice, spectator sports is minor at best. Of course, if 5000 students fight over who gets to drive a stake in the fake forest after a win, that new “designed tradition,” I will be proved wrong. But, you know they might be actors hired to advance the “tradition.” Since the new fashion is Black, maybe in early September the Autzen crowd will chant over and over – Bring Back Robo-Duck!!!
Roger Thompson and others like to attribute some of the increasing enrollment to our winning program. Yet, no analysis has been performed, and the glaringly obvious increase in enrollments everywhere suggests that something else is going on. Admins see what they want to see, bend facts to support their pet projects that fit nicely into their short tenures, before they move on. Nobody checks them, the gullible trust them… yada yada yada.
Both Oregon (great football team) and Colorado (one of the all-time worst football teams) have similar out-of-state enrollment. Any simple attempt to control for other factors will demonstrate that football does little for our enrollment.
Tax Deductible Mordor
The PIK (Payment in Kind) Palace. Making a joke out of “amateur sports” since 2013.
Black Box—encompassing the horror
How many armed UO police will be over there guarding this, and who pays?
I’m reminded of that scene in Bombay Wedding with the rich American uncle.
PHIL-anthropic Monstrosity
The Swoosh Shrine
Vanity Village
I think this will be an exercise in how PK can evade prevailing wage laws. As for name “Duck Shack: Eugene’s only 24 hour lap dance palace.”
Village Vainglorious
Nike Plantation
“Winning” and add a lifesize statue of Charlie Sheen hold his thumb up.
I was trying to think of what to do with some visiting relatives. How about a football game? Nope, decent seats are $200 each. $1000 for the crew. Apparently winning matters to a lots of rich people with money to burn, but I was happier when we were ranked #30.
Ducks’ Crib
Phil’s Crib? The Jock Crib?
I’m thinking there’s a two word max if we want this to go viral. And we do. Crib plays off Nike’s Paterno Day Care Center angle, with a gangster edge. Let’s start thinking about the youtube video. Students?
http://espn.go.com/college-football/story/_/id/8160568/nike-takes-joe-paterno-name-child-care-center-company-headquarters
Refining . . . since its a football-only facility, which is all-male, Drakes’ Crib might be more accurate.
Nike Plantation (not my submission) seems most accurate and highlights the fact the players are being used and aren’t getting paid. Seems to me it would definitely be remembered especially now that the manor house has been so thoroughly imaged.
Ducks on the Pond–i.e. an easy target. If nothing else, it’s an easy target for criticism.
The Hatfield-Dowlin Complex aka the Football Performance Center aka The Shrine to Jesus Christ Philip Hampson Knight is quite the feat of football-industrial construction. What people don’t realize is that virtually the entire building is made with materials imported to Oregon by construction firms based outside the state. Phit LLC does not work with architects and local subcontractors because Phil believes they produce inferior work. The only interior piece that was made in Oregon (from what the school has released) is a pool table.
Couple that with the universities decision to kill off local contractors by heavily restricting product licensing agreements and the University of Oregon becomes a net job killer, costing the state of Oregon hundreds of jobs in construction, garment work, graphics and other areas. Since the University of Oregon has increased tuition well out of the price-range of middle-class Oregonians, the university is now wholly dependent on students from California, Washington and other states to continue to fund operations of the athletic department, under the guise of funding a four-year University.
In conclusion, Nike is basically treating Oregon like Thailand or another southeast Asian country, getting tax breaks and other benefits from the government while putting wage pressure on the marketplace until it pays the workers what it wants (zero; in this case, the cost of a “college scholarship” to be walking product billboards) while the world outside deteriorates due to poverty, hunger and lack of upward mobility. The end result is that Nike is more profitable than ever, its stock options are worth more and the beast can feed itself in perpetuity.
Well sure, but like I said we need two words, and a 30 second youtube. Revise and resubmit.
Quacker Box
Quack Crib is the winner so far.
Anyone know how to trademark a name? I’m figuring I can sell the rights to Phil Knight for enough money to buy public records about the Jock Box and Mac Court subsidies from Randy Geller and Doug Park.
Quack House
Animal House 2013!
Quack House is potentially defamatory. Which is nice. I’ll have to “run it by legal” as they like to say in JH, to make sure.
Quack Crib = weak sauce
It won’t get you where you want to go. Anything “quack” will be determined to be goofy.
Where’s the sex in these? Other than the Penn State kind, I mean.
Gladiatorum? A double entrendre here–since Herpes gladiatorum is a very contagious virus spread by athletes. (you can google it)
How about ‘Wet Troglodite Foundry’ or abbreviated: WTF!?
The Academic’s Envy
Seriously? Maybe an academic with serially bad taste.
Duck Star
Quack Shack
Quack Shack has poetry. I vote for that.
Centerpiece story on the NYTimes website:
http://www.nytimes.com/2013/08/03/sports/ncaafootball/oregon-football-complex-is-glittering-monument-to-ducks-ambitions.html?hp&_r=0
All publicity is good publicity. Right?
“We are the University of Nike,” said Jeff Hawkins, the senior associate athletic director of football administration and operations. “We embrace it. We tell that to our recruits.”
You cannot make this shit up.
Thanks for the quotes. I don’t have the stomach to read this NYT story until I get a few more glasses of scotch in my system, so let me know if there’s anything else in it.
Yeah, a very good idea. Wish I’d saved it to read later. There are some descriptions in there that haven’t yet been reported in the O or the RG and one has to wonder where this ends and how. The only thing I’ll quote is Mullens saying “this isn’t excessive”.
I so hope Rob Mullens is taking Mr. Hawkins to “how to do an interview 101” and “things not to say”……Ridiculous.
No. His style is to first defend the craziness that his people spew as they pretend to speak on behalf of the university. Remember David Williford’s “Statistics can prove anything” quote? https://uomatters.com/2011/12/dave-willifords-statistical-critique-of.html
+1 the Plantation. Nike Community College.
“We are the University of Nike.” WHen they just come out and say it, is it all over? Should we give up? If we tell students to go elsewhere will the University of Nike be doomed? If we are honest with new faculty recruits this year (I plan to be), will be hire the talent we want? Do the admins even care about that anymore?
Diplomas read University of Oregon. Does Jeff Hawkins want to change that also to read University of Nike.
Phil-Gotten Heights
Eugene’s Folly
Swoosh Chalet
Bling Box
Vote!
Swooshie Bar
Shoveler’s Shrine
(As in Northern Shoveler duck, or whatever)
Respectfully declined. Next!
Phil-Gotten Gains
(Apologies to previous anonymous poster for the idea)
I gotta say, I love Quack House.
Me too, but don’t names for UO buildings have to be approved by the Faculty Advisory Committee?
http://committees.uoregon.edu/sites/committees.uoregon.edu/files/FAC%20annual%20Senate%20report%206-18-13.pdf
I believe the Senate has the final word on naming rights.
Black Chasm
Phallus Palace wins my vote. And it got the most laughs at a dinner party tonight.
This is my favorite. Quack House is just too benign for the monstrosity. Admittedly, it’s hard to use casually in polite conversation. But a Phallus Palace is what it is.
Jocks’ Lair
It’s a tough call. I think it’s going to take a Senate vote to decide. Or maybe a faculty assembly. Meanwhile keep em coming!
Phil paid the Nepalese child laborers who made the rugs in the coach’s office more than the Duck players get.
Yea, those poor forlorn Duck players, all they get is free ride scholarships & their asses so pampered, they installed machines to spray-n-wipe their duck butts. See this video @ the 1.53 mark…. I’m not kidding. http://registerguard.com/rg/news/local/30268421-75/football-center-university-hall-maintenance.html.csp?sp-tk=5FBACCFB4AABBD8B640459BB54E147AAF0A472E6BB6B8E2863656533B9DA38E43114272BA0B0CB7687411A623D44D911A992BC834F1F32EB6E1C3DDD49033E6BD7551782969B3F245982D6463A9360084D12D1AB9196AFE422EDF62180F351E84459812CE9FF6BE02EFFBF1538B01D95D8CBAD843C94592FCED0308C9D6C41FE2E66CA341879E48CDC944FC4F213EDE0D5F2C2E7
I gotta get back to posting Rudnick’s latest invoices soon, but this is poetry. Thanks.
I’m no child molester, but that hot-tub looks like a nice spot for some discreet buggery.
It is un-fucking-believable that you would make that comment and that UO Matters does not consider it offensive enough to remove. Evoking innocent children who are victims of terrible crimes in some attempt at humor and insinuating that UO coaches might do similar things is truly beyond belief. If I was a JH administrator I would go to court to take down UOM over this one post alone. It makes me sick to think I might work in the same place as you Jerry and that I do work in the same place as UOM.
Have to agree. It should have been removed earlier.
Yea, Jerry. Oregon coaches would never do that. We’re so confident that they wouldn’t, that we’re not even thinking about installing cameras in the showers, or checking IDs at the door, or keeping an eye out for strange behavior. Nothing evil is every going to happen at Oregon, because we above such things, having been brought under the wing of Nike, which would also never do such things. We’re awesome and above reproach, just because.
What does that have to do with a foul comment?
To un-f believable: I appreciate your comments. Former Penn State President Spanier apparently once agreed with them. Now get off my blog.
Ha…tit for tat?
Un-fucking-believable here: Happy to leave and never return. What a sick and twisted place it is and mind you have. I pity you. Seek help, you need it.
Speaking of denial, the day care center at Nike was named after Joe Paterno: http://bossip.files.wordpress.com/2012/07/joepa-child-development-center-e1342123834960.jpg
And so you’re probably also aware that the Nike worker peeps like to educate their children at the Roman Catholic private schools.
Ahhh… that must have been Jim.
This guy wants the UO admin to sue UOM over a buggery joke?
KoolAid’s Revenge
How about “The Lusty Drake?”
Quack Stack
I know, I’m talking Quack again, but I am having a difficult time finding a word rhyming with abomination.
Domination abomination?
Another look at college sports-
“Hirer Education”,
http://www.efn.org/~hkrieger/sport.htm
Duck Blind
How about Nike u. They are their own institution after all and we just have a generous exchange relationship.
The Big House
Sweat Shop
The athletes sweat about getting there, and the people who keep them in luxury work in one.
That’s why I think Nike Plantation or The Plantation really speaks to the issue instead of only satirizing. Now that “The University of Nike” has spoken and with a serious intent towards recruits–and not *just* football recruits either–then some thought should be given to the real issues.
second
Yes, “Nike Plantation” captures the fundamental inequities of the system in which (mostly) white men profit from the exploited labor of (mostly) young black men. Uncle Phil is the plantation owner, the coaches (and UO President) are plantation overseers, and the players are the hired hands. The uniforms may have improved and the system may have become much more modernized, but a plantation is a plantation.
I Say Sweat Shop. It’s Short. It’s AccuRate. Doesn’t Directly Bring RAce Into As A Distracting Issue.aAnd Given Phil Knights Previous Conflict With The Faculty I’m Sure He’ll Love It. Plus We Don’t Come Off As Jealous.
Weak mimic, dude.
Sweat shop!!! It’s where ‘da money comes from. Exploitive poverty wages in the 3rd world, selling $100 dollar gym shoes stateside. Knight wants the world to know he “just did it”.
I’m no economist, but while you may think yourself too good for Phil’s “sweat shop” jobs, they’ve saved mankind from the idiocy of rural life.
Bengali Sweat Shoppe
Shortened to “BS”? Works for me!
Triumph of the Phil.
Not quite catchy enough to stick but a nice talking point that is a reference to film maker Leni Riefenstahl’s masterful propaganda for the Nuremberg rallies.
The Quack House: Triumph of the Phil.
I like it, but dangerously close to an invocation of Godwin’s law.
Good point. I’d hate to close off the conversation. This was a visual image with a handy rhyme. So perhaps other iconic propaganda will come
Serial Box (Phil keeps building)
Or Quackerjock Box, a prize in every one
Though I think Quack House or Ye Olde Sweat Shoppe is going to win, the anatomy name will persist in conversation but would be difficult for Youtube.
That’s Frohnmayer on the right, no?
I was wondering the same thing…
Wow, so now Rudnick has to renegotiate all the “The University of Oregon” articles to say “This is an agreement between the University of Nike and the faculty union?” Seems like that’s worth 1-2% a year.
I presume we all get dividends or stock options then right? Maybe that’s why there’s no money for raises, a new employee stock program is going to be announced??!!
Time to vote.
On a serious, long term note: how will this latest oblation to sports materialism play out in the long term scheme of what is, still, the University of Oregon?
I’d like to see some perspective from those who care to see what this “gift” portends. Players and coaches interviewed don’t know what to say about the Bling Plantation as though they’d viewed Cinderella’s castle, shot into a sports field, for the first time. What does this presentation represent to students who will not see this or student-athletes who will use this complex and never, repeat never, see anything like it again?
It appears the self-absorbed emperor is shooting his last wad in hopes others will follow his ideals to his personal ends. It reminds me of those insecure kids in school who have just the right extreme presents for their curried “best friends”.
I wish Rob Mullens and the other admins cared about public opinion. They’re getting torn to shit in the RG today. Loving it!
Does anyone else not recognize the systemic risk. You tie your University so closely to sports, what happens if sports goes down the tubes. Or if a scandal happens (which they will). Talk about putting all your eggs into one basket (and we don’t even know if that basket does anything positive, the best evidence suggests very small positive effects).
Time to drop baseball and add something cheaper, like beach volleyball?
Dog to Awesome0
Identifying a single university in the US that has every suffered the downside consequences of this systematic risk. Yes, the potential is there, but in practice Universities don’t unduly suffer. Take the horrible incidents at Penn State – the University is still functioning (well, in fact).
Students will still come to the UO, independent of the ranking of the football team. Classes will still be taught – yes in suckass classrooms, but they will
still be taught. Faculty will still be underpaid. The UO –> UN machine will still give degrees.
The only suffering, I think, comes if the UO athletics program were *heavily*
subsidized by the academic side and this is not the case here.
Why should an athletic program with this sort of money to burn be hitting up the academic side for *any* subsidies? The hidden subsidies at UO are o the order of $5 million a year. The difference between the union and admin salary proposals is only $6M a year.
That’s the part of “gifting” that has never made any sense to me. If someone goes to the lengths of leasing property, building without care to cost and “gifting” it back, then why make the UO pay maintenance and to his specifications? Why ask for tutor subsidies? While watching the state education dollars dwindle, why NOT just gift a little more and make sure it’s all done to the emperor’s liking? It leads one to see more than a little vindictiveness behind the “gifts”.
Awesome0 to Dog.
Penn State will pay 100’s of millions in lawsuit damages when it is all said and done. UC Boulder had to millions because due to sexual violence on its team. Just wait until the lawsuits from the players come for the head injuries. I think the point of systemic risk is what do we do if the whole system of college football goes down the tubes because of issues like violence (Aaron Hernandez appears to have been involved in murders while being recruited at U Florida which they swept under the rug), corruption, and injuries to players resulting in class action lawsuits.
Dog
1. I agree there should be no subsidies at all, that’s why I used the term “heavy”
2. I am aware of the Penn State, Ohio State, Miami, etc law suit issue but
that’s not going to impact the institutions very much – there are many laundering schemes available for that, potential donor bail out, legal delays, etc – the point is that its not going to come out of the operating
budget for the institution. Now if that happened, then that would be payback for the systematic risk.
So this is why Jamie Moffitt can’t pay the faculty – she’s accumulating reserves for football lawsuits, over in the academic budget.
Is UO insured against these risks? What’s the policy limit? Do the students have to pay those premiums too?
Dog
if Moffit were really doing this – she should be jailed. This won’t happen – there is insurance (I don’t know the details) and there are donors that will
bail student athletes out of jail and bail our program our of lawsuit land
if we ever get there. As far as I can tell (and most of this comes from ESPN investigative reporting and yes Bellotti still works there)
a) The UO excessive lavishness on athletic facilities draw national attention and subjects us to ridicule and ire – no lawsuits there
b) The UO is engaged in the same set of NCAA violations involving recruiting that almost every other top 25 school is involved in.
c) The arrest rate at the UO is smaller compared to other schools. Most of our football players are not arrested. see http://arrestnation.com/category/sports/college-football/
The IAC has asked the AD about the insurance issue. We got nothing. Not even on their radar. (Why should it be when Moffitt and Gottfredson are in office, ready to bail them out?)
Systemic means shared. That means everybody is doing it isn’t the answer, its the underlying problem.
I don’t the AD was looking at $$, they couldn’t take their eyes off of other assets.
Can’t . . . Stop. . Sobriqueting:
Run-Amok Lounge
Philistine Funhouse
I’d love a classroom as nice as that one in PLC. My PLC classroom is far worse.
“Type “UniversityofNike.com” into your browser and see where it takes you.” A quick whois check shows that the domain was only created on 8/3/13. Clearly, someone is trying to make a joke.
“7/31/2013: Back in 2010 the NY Times reported that the UO students were calling the Jaqua athlete-only tutoring center the “Jock Box”.
OK, maybe that was because I made up the name and then told the reporter that’s what everyone on campus was calling it”
Hmmm. So, you are admitting that you are a liar and fabricated information for a journalist? That’s an interesting move….
My fantasy: UO sells the whole athletic franchise to Phil Knight and he takes it pro. UO becomes a university instead of a sports venue, and the millions we get from selling it endow a special fund that can only be used for raises for faculty (and maybe staff), or only be used to rehab our dying classrooms. Maybe we could keep the price below $100 million in return for some cheap student tickets.
Mens insana in corpore sano
Sticking to the buggery theme:
percurrent raphanique mugilesque
I came in too late on this naming effort, but the suggestions are hilarious….
Phallus Palace & Swoosh Shrine are good… I’ll throw two name suggestions out just for fun….
• Excessive √
(the checkmark is a mock Swoosh) Clearly throwback re the “Mullens saying “this isn’t excessive”, remark.
• Nikeville
Ok students and faculty, time for our own promo video highlighting the luxurious accommodations of some of our finest offices and classrooms. Upload to YouTube and post links here. Surely there’s an ass-splasher in the bathrooms in PLC.
How can Gottfredson and his minions be so fucking tone-deaf on the heels of continued tuition increases, lagging faculty salaries and millions in overdue building maintenance costs. All this excess and not one word from our “leader” on how this reconciles with all that. The jury vote is in – Gottfredson is a major fail with a hand up his ass working his mouth.
That last line is classic. Can someone with an artistic bent put a picture of that on a button?
Please tell me Helfrich didn’t just say, “… how they treat their students, not just their student athletes.” Surely not.
Yes, that line was the real jaw-dropper. I suppose he means that it’s a gift to the non-football students just to be able to look at the building and know what an awesome experience the team is having here at UO.
They already see their experience up close as they sit beside them struggling through course work, waiting for their private tutors to do the work.
finis coronat opus
Ends justify the means
minus quam cerebro capita
Something like, “heads larger than brains”
Seems fitting.
“Id tantum fac”!
= “Just fuck it” – ooops, sorry (!!!) I guess that Freudian slip was also my one-cuss-word allowance. Of course I meant “Just do it”….
I love the name “ass splasher” for the fanny showers they have in the toilets! Yes! You need a professional grade tour de ruins of the “historic”/rustic/neglected/downright funk of the facilities– maybe titled “Excessive”???
By the way, I first liked Phallus Palace for a roaring laughter response, but now the “Sweat Shop” is starting to sink in as being a higher level of snark & the double entendre of Uncle Phil’s source of wealth. I stumbled upon this remark which nails it, in my opinion.
” The real problem, which is rarely mentioned, is the source of the millions Phil Knight has bestowed upon the University of Oregon. Workers in Bangladesh earn $36 a month, workers in Cambodia $80 a month, in both cases working long hours producing hundreds or thousands of Nike garments that sell for exponentially more per item! This is exploitation that goes beyond reason, keeping workers in poverty while rewarding Phil Knight (and through him Oregon football) with millions. Did Phil Knight “earn” these millions? Isn’t he responsible for the poverty of the workers that produce his wealth?”
Why does the word “Excessive” keep surfacing?
Why should so many sweat shop workers live in poverty, so some college football kid can have an ass splashing toilet?? I would think wiping one’s own ass, should be a skill worthy of any Mighty Duck.
Well, at least the lockers are large enough to cram a freshman player in as a prank…. the kid would have fresh circulated air & a magic shelf that requires no plug in to charge up an i pad or cell phone. Maybe even put in a call to the Souse chef or juice bar clerk to bring something up?? Life’s good there @ the Sweat shop.
$36 a month is $36 a month more than our footballers take home. The NCAA is a Sweat Shop like no other.
Satis nikae sapientiae parum
Can you classicists start posting translations too? I only know the dirty words.
Sallust famously said “Satis eloquentiæ sapientiæ parum”–Enough eloquence, little wisdom… My spin: “Enough Nike, littl wisdom”
Some news and new quotes for you:
http://www.csnnw.com/ducks/true-cost-new-nike-u-football-building-estimated-138-million
And Pintens? Full of PR crap, as usual. Metaphorically speaking, of course.
Thanks, posted.
Where are the t-shirts? I read about the University of Nike in the NYT and googled it but there are no t-shirts. Is it a real university?
How about moles non agitat mentem, “the mass (or large building) does not stir the mind”? Or leave out the non just to show that the tail is wagging the dog.
The BBC reports (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-23575249):
A luxury toilet controlled by a smartphone app is vulnerable to attack, according to security experts.
Retailing for up to $5,686 (£3,821), the … toilet uses bluetooth to receive instructions via the app, but the Pin code for every model is hardwired …
“An attacker could simply download the My Satis application and use it to cause the toilet to repeatedly flush, raising the water usage and therefore utility cost to its owner,” it says in its report.
“Attackers could [also] cause the unit to unexpectedly open/close the lid, activate bidet or air-dry functions, causing discomfort or distress to [the] user.”
Wait until Sharknado gets hold of that news!
I’ve found my handle! Check it out on Goggle Images
We smoked it all. Nos fumabat omnes stercore, according to google translate. (Loosely, since I’m not sure if latin cuss words count against my quota).
Maybe add “Property of …”?
Stop the presses! The Latin is wrong.
“We smoked it all” would be “Fumabamus omnia” or “Omnia fumabamus”
Correct, Nos (we = first person plural) and the ending -bat (third-person singular imperfect active indicative of fumare) do not match. -bamus is the correct third person plural. Indicative and Imperfect, of course, just as we human beings all are …
someone mentioned adding the Nike Swooosh. Couldn’t the swooosh take the shape of a Cannabis leaf? a burnt one preferably?
This quote, from Campbell’s article, shows the warped, self serving mindset of college athletics at the bigger schools:
“In an effort to face the issues at hand, former ASUO Athletics Commissioner Katherine DuPont polled 595 students gauging interest in penalizing students who leave before the end of the 3rd quarter of football games.”
Penalizing students for exercising freedom by, gasp, leaving a game early?? What are they going to do–lock them in? Attempt to record which student leaves and when? Alienate the students in general so they don’t even show up for the first half??! Heaven forbid a person acts upon the impulsive thought there might be something much better to do with their time.
Shazam, Batman, it’s worse than we thought.
Add a made in china logo to it please and you have one more buyer.
Dog says
that looks like a Cafepress designed tee shirt.
Try to add a perverted Nike Swoosh to it – If I could upload an image here
I would show you an example but this blog doesn’t have that capability –
probably a good thing otherwise people would post even more crap here –
still my photoshopped FuckTard Crossing sign in front of Johnson Hall
would be a nice addition …
Will Cafepress sell University of Nike bongs too? I’m just asking because a friend wanted to know.
No offense, professor, but the tshirt should be slim fit and Dry-FIT…
… and an “STD” for “Smoke the Day” on the back (yes, the double-meaning is intended).
Id omne fumavimus
comes closest for the Latin.
Money Moves Mountains
Sincerely,
The Sweat Shop Lady
Please vote for my entry in the naming contest! No shame…..wait, that’s another good t-shirt logo!
Id omne fumavimus.
So where are our t-shirts already? You call this a University? Sheesh.
“$4 from each shirt goes to help UO Matters pay UO’s exorbitant public records fees.”
How about a full breakdown of the cost per shirt and where ALL the $$ goes? You know for transparency so we know you aren’t skimming off the top to buy the scotch.
This comment merits public censure. Obtaining public records from Geller requires money and a few stiff drinks. It’s a Leontief production function. You’ll be hearing from my legal department, as soon as I get enough money to send them a nice bottle.
“$4 from each shirt goes to help UO Matters pay UO’s exorbitant public records fees.”
In the interest of transparency,breakdown of where the rest of the $$ goes, so we know you aren’t just buying scotch.
Slogan for the tee shirt/sweat shop: Deodorant is Optional
This is Eugene, after all.
A late suggestion for a new motto, in tribute to the University’s former motto:
Penis agitat canem
“The tail wags the dog,” more or less.
Subtle. Maybe should be wags the duck?
That would be:
Penis agitat anatem.
Sweat Shop Lady tries again:
If my Latin translator is correct:
Bonum est cupiditas
It has several meanings, and rolls off the tongue.
Check it out:
http://www.goducks.com/ViewArticle.dbml?DB_OEM_ID=500&ATCLID=209049164
After dissing the local media, NOW they want their “metaphoric explanation”, attempted CYA, published asap.
Wow. Shoes too? Impressive.
Has anyone yet heard Gottfredson speak to this “University of Nike” issue? At all?
Has anyone yet heard Gottfredson speak to any issue with substance? No. He’s a walking press release ever since he tried an open meeting with faculty and failed miserably. Since then, nothing but press releases with empty rhetoric.